Now picture this - 4 pluckers and fuckers with past lives doused in DIY dabbling and dubious happenings.  A stickman who once let a Hornby Mallard entered his back passage in the hope of raising money for the local Sexual Signal Box, a place where he carried out various obscenities against flag flying guardsman.  A guitarist who once smoked 7 spliffs using his oriental eye and ended up in front of the race relations board for offences against the local Triads and Rice Liberation Front.  Another guitarist who has slept his way to the bottom and hidden his Polish homosexuality behind a facade of male modelling and running a butchers shop.  And finally a frontman who has had several affairs with Captain Beefheart look-a-likes and who once set up a midnight meeting with a retailer of Bubble Helmets and got bummed at the back of a Rumbelows warehouse.  Now many reviewers would shy away from assessing the overspill of such deviants but - I like folk who have no boundaries, those who use their bodies as an affront to decency and those who are beyond hope.  Add to this the fact that these are ruddy nice guys, have played many a Fungal show in various guises and understand the DIY battle  - of course, in I go.  This is a fine 'live' unit, here I have been given the only copy to be released thus far - is this a kind act or a mere grooming situation that will leave me with very little elasticity left in the old duffelbag - I shall take the risk.

Firstly and 'Porton Down' is a cultured and erudite mellow drift with a great pastel stroke of impressive colourisation that wins applause without being vulgar and garish.  A carefully structured composite with all players given room and airspace and so making for an arrangement that really showcases a band thinking and avoiding the trappings of the 'orthodox genre' snare. This gently tainted observation of LSD based experimentation has its own psychedelic accents.  Staggerings and spearings welcome, detached driftings entrance and the overall flow is a massage melody of considered craftsmanship.  Vocals are shared and compliment perfectly, the pillow-soft descent into abstraction is posted homeward with great accuracy and the more one rotates this masterful moment the more ones falls into the realms of conviction and appreciation.  A manifold manifestation of various generic gist’s with a tattooing through of shadow echoes and shimmer shifts - fascinating.

Love and hate clash, bash and contrast within the weft and weave of 'She Stole My Ride'.  A careful start of creamy care and low-brow technicality before the players up the ante and sub-skip and skank along with zested Euro-textured vibes that sets the senses to level 'fizzle'.  Stutter stop starts and into the flow proper we go with the arrangement multi-layered, zipping and very melodic.  Moments of sobered styles intertwine with the more frivolous foamings still effective. Alongside we note the wire wankers having a personal, yet unified ball.  Thoughtful music pasted down in part with a subtle delicacy and know-how and yet with all impasto urges satisfied.  The shadings are many, the spectrum touched in all areas with a moment of pseudo-yodelling both contrasting and naked.  It all adds to the depth of the donation and I am taken and... convinced.

The final fling of the three is 'Heading For The Sinners' - a forthright look-back at times with dubious characters, where beers flowed and mischief was made.  A steady bass groove, a twisting pulsation, a sanguine stick beat and a magnetising post-punk hook. The four cabled beast continues to provide the immovable foundations whilst a cold scalpel edge cuts to the core as the verse and chorus slice through any resistance. We are blessed with a delicious cutlet of heavy duty noise both melodramatic, haunting and chugged up.  The band have shown great potential and delivered with sound authority here.  The blending of all sonic tonal values is exact and exemplary, the thermal energy radiated inescapable and the fact that this avoids that 'bog standard' punkery is the icing on the nutritious cake.  A relish for the job at hand is exhibited in a cutely creative gem.

I knew this low were good, I just hoped they could do the business on CD.  My worries are blown away into the ether, this is a fine hat-trick of well-devised ditty-making and I hope it serves them well and those trapped in their niches of noise are welcoming of this different flavour.  I am privileged to have this sneak lug-treat and I am thankful for the quality that has penetrated the aural orifices.

An email, a semi-request for a review, a play and a ponder and then I found out that this band has become a cornerstone of a resurgent Western Maryland punk scene.  I halted my investigations before I became warped and swung all the wrong way, one likes to be neutral tha' knows.  I noted that the crew are over here and playing a few miles away, alas I am a higgledy-piggledy busy bugger and can only do what I do, this is my bit before I piss off looking for bugs.

Several clicks, the music begins to play and as I don the headphones I am initially addressed by the tonal charms of 'Let's Make Some Noise'.  This is a light and carefully textured affair that is the kind of clean-cut noise that many, who like things less offensive and raw, will utterly love.  The musicianship is choice and the band play with a good fluent unity with the style of sonica of a sub-pop, semi-smooth slant that avoids anything raucous, heavy and aggressive.  As a lover of things more warted I can still appreciate the accents and angles that transpire here and the very hygienic approach that will give a real boner to those with washed hair, clean clothes and a full set of teeth - cripes - I am fucked then.  Tidy work and into 'Trying To Break (Bad Habits)' with a glassy twinkle tinkle and a slow and steady pace.  The verses are spartan, slightly snotty and with a need to have that volume ranked up so as to get the best out of the mix.  The ascension into the chorus cut is careful, the chorus itself almost a non-event but it does help the fluidity and takes away from the song falling into the hopeless arms of 'stuttersville'.  Again we have a song that is polished and scrubbed up but when whacked up on high matters become more impressive.  I can take or leave these two opening gambits but note is made of a very educated and adept band.

The next brace, 'Everybody Hates A Parade' is the best song so far, zippy, tetchy and with a fine contrast between the wires, the oral overspills and the splashed up sticks.  Perhaps a very orthodox tune but I feel that the style of the sonica is suited to a speedy delivery and the simple chorus chunk is without flamboyance and is very effective.  Tight and tuneful and radiating a worthy breeze of belligerence without being overly aggressive the band nail this one and onto 'Coney Island High' we go.  The latest lilt is 'Coney Island High' - a real cultured and homely affair with an opening sequence of thoughtful composition.  As we travel on we get a sugary tune with a panging that will hit home with those in the know.  A rose-tinted rock out done in a very relaxed manner with a slice of cheese thrown in and many expected accoutrements.  In many ways this is gentle punkery that lacks the spikes and studs of the more usual racket-making, we have pop-punk folks, the kind played within a certain niche for those found therein.  Is being inoffensive duly offensive - now there is something to think about!

'Brighter Times' is the worst song of the lot for me, a countrified bumpkin jig that really doesn't tremble my tractor or indeed force my hens to get all clucked up.  Hey, this is purely a personal viewpoint and the whole arrangement is not my kind of cacophonic cha'.  Having said this - the flow is sweet, the application exact and the tuneful trickle no doubt worthy of many more appreciative lugs.  I am moving on quickly here - I hope I don't find a pitchfork up my arse anytime soon.  'Frequent Flyer' is a musos number for the touring tunester who does what needs doing and then moans about it ha, ha.  A languid and half-doped ditty that drifts along and goes through some soporific sensations that are in cahoots with the theme chosen.  A lazy kind of drawl, an overly Americanised meandering that seems to let go of its magnetic appeal and just play away to nowhere in particular.  I suggest this is one for the end of the CD - the musical outro would be certainly suitable as a closing piece.

'Insomniac' is perhaps the oddment in the pack, a real snippet of outré-dabbling that sees the band rumble-grumble, play the orthodox and key matters up and so create a multifaceted mongrel of music that hobbles along with tongue lolling and nether regions dripping.  Tones of yore are within the weft, glammy essences are found and something experimental resonates.  I am not sure if I like this one but what I am sure of is that it is necessary piece and stretches the band a little further outside any form of comfort zone.  I listen over and appreciate it a little more - but I do prefer the nippy noise and feisty relish of 'No More Nights' - what a ruddy good blast out this is and it gets me thinking that if the band played out a 10 track CD with a rip-roaring collection of 2-minute Ramonesy style songs they would surely top all that they have done so far.  This has a zeal, a forthright authority and a grabbing melody and pace that is just spot on the mark  - a real zenith that gets the best out of a talented team for sure.  To back up my ponderings comes another barnstormer (albeit longer than need be) with the glorious explosion of 'girl come good' celebration that highlights a rebel doing well and holding her own.  The booze is a bonus it seems, the blitzing whizzery most excellent and I reckon if this was another short stinger things would be even better but... this is still a beauty.  These latter two tracks are a cracking double act - the CD has reached another level.

Last two folks - 'Back To The Wind' and 'Right Turn (Wrong Way Again)'. Both songs help us roll out on a chipper footing with the melodica high and the eagerness of the players more than obvious.  All areas are lucid, the former track continues the tempo injection as found in the previous donations, we get the usual standard of rhythm craft and controlled rowdiness whereas the latter track is more stable and routine in its approach but has plenty of gumption, cock-sure sanguinity and of course, the usual solidity of style.  I can't find anything to gripe about with these closing pieces - unshakable work with a few posing breaks (well, why not) and some added baubles of goodness to keep ya fascinated - a fine way to sign off.

Nah then how’s that?  Have ye been tempted by the honest and personal words or duly put off?  Are ye ready to delve in and discover the dunnage for yourselves?  This is a solid band with more to come I think, all I can do is what I do – a thankless task but the spirit is humble and having a go – on we go!   

This lot played a Fungalised gig recently, they were a man down and still rocked the rafters.  I was mesmerised and quite taken by the approach, the DIY warmth and sincerity and the darn good tunes.  They have the right idea, are playing for the love of it and considering anything else a bonus.  Here my thoughts on a quick CD that does the business and has been used several times whilst I work out on the punchbag - oomph!

Away we go with 'Cocaine Boner Casanova' - ooh the dirty blighters.  This is a 'live for the moment' kick arse blow out that moves on in with effective gumption and a bit of flamboyance before cracking on with a reckless rock and roll movement that has a 'fuck it' approach that many will adore.  The pluckers plead for more beer, drugs and nob stiffening sonica - by heck, and here's me thinking they were all gentle homosexuals happy to read back issues of 'Raised Rings'.  This is a fruity piece and has wallop, the basic lunatic riffery and some added nobs on and, as a bonus, all areas are loud, clear and brash - yes man.  Ooh where's me blue pills and jazz mags.  Play loud and wank man but please, don't spill yer beer.

We follow on with the same vibe but with a greater control.  'Let's Get Wasted' is a theme long whipped but here the verse is highly enticing and the slip into the chorus is sublime.  This latter component has a sing-a-long corn quality that may be typical and orthodox but which has a magnetism that I can truly appreciate.  It is a short and simple song but walloped home by boozers and wreckheads who are doing things mighty fuckin' well.  Yes - a joy, I may get the sherry out again.

'You're A Nazi' is another topic that does the rounds, here dealt with in forthright and no nonsense style.  A fine up-standing song in a world where too much shit-flinging has diluted the 'Nazi' slag which is a shame because there are some real hateful twats out there.  Some folk need to wake up - on both sides of the fence, stop the hate ya silly cunts and just get on.  The band put their conkers on the line and show where they stand which should always be applauded.  I love the approach and ethos and always adore the following contrast which calls for 'Absolute Freedom' which could be accused of contradicting the preceding outburst - not so!  We are all entitled to opinions, the only way to alter matters is to be open, talk and think.  Fists will fly and only cement divisions, there are knuckleheads on all sides, they are defeating freedom and their own objectives.  A really well-crafted and thought provoking song this and maybe, the best of the lot - it is neatly arranged and has a good weight behind the hoofing - watch yer delicate conkers folks.

'Let's Get Tattoos' is a politically-free bout of fine old nonsense.  It is great escapism with a lovable riff, an idiot sing-a-long sequence and will more than likely see some daft bugger wake up after a morn of the lash with a permanent mark of embarrassing quality.  A fine flowing effort this, played by lads having fun and switching styles quite ruddy nicely.  It would be easy to harp on about the gripes and gear grinds in life, sometimes we just need something less profound - neat work lads.

2 more songs come, namely 'Let's Get Wasted (Radio Edit' and 'Let's Get Tattoos (Radio Edit) - I have commented on these, this is more of the same with a slight change in the end product.  Two good songs but I would have preferred 2 new tracks - ooh the twisting devils.

So - 5 tracks, 2 semi-repeats but still worth your lug time.  This is a really good unit who are easy to get into and enjoy without too much brain strain.  Accommodating chaps, happy to muck in, no egos and as good 'live' as on CD - now what more could you ask for - ah yes, another CD release, some up-to-date Razzle mags and an added kick in the pecker pills - whoosh.